Tinero, Aharonov and Associates Tinero*, Aharonov and Associates A Family Law Practice, LLP

* Ellen Friedman Tinero has retired from the firm


What happens to the children in a California divorce?

Obviously, it would be impossible for California parents to keep their divorce a secret from the children. More than likely, the kids are already aware that something is wrong and may even surmise that divorce is imminent. However, that does not mean that parents cannot keep the children out of the proceedings.

Far too many parents across the country use their children as leverage against the other party. They might threaten to "take the children away" from the other parent unless he or she gives in to certain demands. Having an understanding of the divorce and child custody laws here in California could help put a parent's mind at ease. It is not up to one parent alone to decide what will happen to the children. The court will consider many factors before deciding custody and visitation issues, all while keeping the best interests of the children in mind.

Hopefully, parents will be able to put aside their differences in order negotiate their own divorce settlement without ending up in a contentious court battle. Many Washington parents are able to do so because they put their children first. They realize that they will always be bound as parents and find a way to communicate and work together in order to co-parent.

Dividing the marital estate is important, but many parents would argue that what happens to the children in a divorce is monumentally more important. Having the freedom to negotiate their own parenting plan gives both parents the opportunity to compromise, which is a skill any parent needs when it comes to raising children. A successfully negotiated parenting plan could lay the foundation for an amicable -- or at least civil -- post-divorce relationship.

Source: The Huffington Post, "7 Things To Remember if You Are Going Through a Divorce", Carol Morgan, Dec. 22, 2015

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* Ellen Friedman Tinero has retired from the firm